Nurses, Cheerleaders, Babysitters, Asians, the Azz: niches and fetishes are the hallmark of Porn 2.0. But I thought that the niche reservoir was drying up after low-wattage celebrities were thrown into the mix. Thank God I was wrong.
Produced by Kelly Madison, “Porn Star Brides” suggests that a wedding dress might be the new tramp stamp, as Sienna West (pictured), Eva Angelina, and Brooke Banner each don dresses and, just as quickly, get fucked right out of them in five vignettes.
At first, the movie plays like a cheesy wedding video by your pimply high school AV geek cousin. In the segment “Punk Rock Bride,” Sienna West intones in a halting voiceover against a backdrop of fluttering rose petals and white satin:
“Ever since I was a little girl. For as long as I can remember. All I wanted to do was get married. To the man that I love. To the man of my dreams. But now that I’m married. All I want to do is (and here the gauzy lighting and tranquil music change) Fuck.”
Ryan Madison (Kelly’s husband/lucky bastard) plays the groom in each vignette, and Kelly is (uncharacteristically) nowhere to be found.