There were a few levels of decadence on display in Tera Patrick’s Porn Star Pool Party, a pay-per-view event now available on DVD. Let’s start with the midgets.

I think that, just as the appearance of a check-cashing place is the sign of a neighborhood’s decline, the appearance of diaper-and-booties-wearing midgets at one’s party is a good indicator of Fall of Empires-level excess.

That’s what Tera Patrick has got at her house. Her “oil babies” hang on her every word but, as soon as La Patrick is out of the room, plan a pool party against her express wishes.

Another level of decadence is Tera’s own participation in this event. While we are heartened to see, in the beginning, that she is topless and oiled, that is the extent of her nudity. She returns to set up scenes from time to time, but essentially she acts as the exotic madam at a brothel; she doesn’t perform the service herself, she just facillitates it.

So the oil babies invite 17 porn stars to Patrick’s jacuzzi and there are several shots of the group of them drinking, but then the movie partitions into individual scenes between two or three women shot on different days. I like any scene with Angie Savage in it, so I include her tryst with Daisy Marie here.

I feel that Tera Patrick’s party-hopping ways have influenced her pornography; she’s not even present at her own soiree. I’m sure this sort of thing doesn’t happen at any of her Vegas events where $1500 bottle service is involved, but if I were any of those naked girls cavorting around the pool, I’d want to thank the hostess.

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Don’t believe the hype about “Pirates II: Stagnetti’s Revenge.” Just get the movie. It’s a keeper, and a movie that, with its precursor, occupies its own tiny niche of Blockbuster Porn. Sometimes blockbusters don’t do everything they should, but “Pirates II” does some things really well. In that way it is the porn equivalent of “Pearl Harbor”; narratively suspect, expensive, all over the place, but a technical milestone.

And the sex scenes? Excessive in just the right way. The theatrical version features some editing we don’t normally see in sex scenes – good editing. The bonus DVD features these same scenes except 20 minutes longer. It almost doesn’t seem like that would even be fun…

Here we see Teagan interviewing Jesse Jane at the premiere this weekend. Teagan starred in the first “Pirates” and is now a free agent. I never thought of her as an interviewer before, but she is very good at it. Jesse Jane, of course, is as well-spoken as Tera Patrick at these events. See? All the Digital Playground girls made good.

Buy “Pirates II: Stagnetti’s Revenge” here
Buy “Pirates” here

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Can’t get enough Tera Patrick? Join her official website now and get exclusive access to home movies, photos and behind the scenes content:

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“The first porn I saw was one of my dad’s Playboys,” Tera Patrick said, “I thought, ‘She looks beautiful.’ And that’s all I thought.”

Patrick is hosting AVN’s 25th annual awards show Saturday night.

“And when I did Playboy myself, I thought, ‘I feel beautiful’. And what was weird was that I was standing there naked in the middle of the room and everyone was rushing around and no one was looking at me.”

When it came to moving from the printed page to video, Patrick acknowledges that some people suddenly became prudish.

“They were saying, ‘How can you do that?’” she said. “And I said, ‘The only differences between that simulated stuff in the magazine and what I’m doing now is that I’m spending less time doing it and I don’t have to hold still.”

Patrick is sanguine about being a porn star and unapologetic. Maybe it’s because her parents aren’t from here.

“I never want to denounce the fact that I am or was a porn star,” she said. “It’s opened a lot of doors for me. I’ve met some wonderful people.”

And Patrick has achieved that level of fame in porn that people buy the whole Tera product, rather than focusing on parts of her anatomy.

“What I’ve come to realize is that people aren’t watching me arch my toes,” she said.

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